Dave Blake

Genetically engineered in a lab and raised by wolverines, Dave Blake went on to become a writer. When that didn’t work out, he got a job. Despite his best efforts and incredible fear of responsibility, he was forced to climb the corporate ladder and was eventually promoted to Boss. Unsatisfied with life in the world of retail, when Dave was approached by the mysterious shadow conspiracy known as 545 he jumped at the chance. Quickly advancing within the ranks, he soon became one of the innermost Circle of Five, who keep their insidious metaphorical tentacles wrapped around every facet of modern society. Then, in what some might call a moment of poor judgment, they asked him to write his own bio... on St Patrick’s Day.

Mmm, whiskey…

Wait, where was I? Oh right, the bio. Anyway, Dave went on to create ViVaVi, a webcomic dedicated to mad science and super-villainy. With explosions. And by exploiting the vast resources of 545, he plans to one day go on to conquer the entirety of the Uninversity… thing. You know what I mean. The thing! The uninverse thing! Look, just… shut up! You’ll pay for your indolence, you’ll all pay!

Shut up.

Benji Pickens

The details of my life are quite inconsequential ... Very well, where do I begin?

My father would womanize; he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes, he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy; the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament.

My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds — pretty standard, really.

At the age of 12, I received my first scribe. At the age of 14, a Zoroastrian named Vilmer ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum — it's breathtaking ... I suggest you try it.

Benji currently resides in Keystone, Colorado.

John Shorling

Like most children, John Schorling was born, gracing his parents with a lovable bundle of anger and violence until age 8, when he discovered marijuana, alcohol and LSD. A combination he will never forget and still uses to remain calm and focused.

At age 12, he discovered women and began his long career of unsuccessful womanizing.

Shortly thereafter at age 27, he left a small piece of shit on a toilet seat in San Diego. Yet he still wonders why he is the behind the scenes man, writing contracts, researching, playing video games and discovering that a B.S. and Ph.D. are not really a bachelors of science and doctor of philosophy, but bullshit piled higher and deeper.

He currently lives in Breckenridge, Colorado.

Robert Max Sirak aka Maz Sirake aka Darth Sirak aka Bobby Max aka Stoned Cold Max aka Pussylips aka JewSmooth has many names but usually goes by Max.

If you look closely the picture you will notice:

  • -Cleveland Browns hat – Max grew up in Canton, Ohio (GlenOak represent).
  • -Hands and face – Ever tried to look hard with six 20-sided and one 30-sided dice in your hands? Didn’t think so.
  • -Two Dungeon Master screens – Yeah, that’s right. Max plays Dungeons and Dragons every week and has for ten years.
  • -Empty jar- Whatever could have been in there?
  • -Grateful Dead mug – Max has a special place in his heart for hippie jam bands (Phish rules!) and tea.
  • -Darth Vader mug- Star Wars, villainy and coffee would also list among Max’s loves.
  • -Wall in the background- As if there were any question left to Max’s dorkiness, the wall pretty much seals it. It’s a word-a-day-wall that began in 2010 on the Ides of March and continues to this very day (today’s word is/was Pontifex).
  • Max also loves (in no particular order): seeing live music, life, laughing, women, meditation, exercise, playing outside, reading, writing, reading poetry naked, eating, drinking, cooking, celebrating, his family and friends, a good glass of whiskey, a powder day, where he lives, cartoons, and the occasional video game.

Ben "Hollywood" Whitmore

Ben “Hollywood” Whitmore was born in Memphis, TN the birthplace of blues, barbeque, and racism. At the tender age of 2, he moved to the Midwest and quickly learned to rely purely on his imagination as his sole form of entertainment in the cultural wastelands of Nebraska and Wisconsin.

Hollywood moved to Orlando, FL and first began performing in theatre and short films in elementary school. He played a deaf mute who left wooden sculptures on the doorsteps of all the town’s children. It WAS as creepy as it sounds, and he still bears the emotional scars from that 5th grade play.

And though the entertainment industry can be a cruel mistress, like most actors Hollywood developed a Stockholm syndrome love affair with acting like a clown for money.

Hollywood’s career took him to New York City, and he knew he had finally hit rock bottom. He also went to Los Angeles and felt fat. (It was during this time that Hollywood memorized useless trivia facts and watched the majority of movies. All of them.)

After falling in love with the Rockies working at a theatre in Colorado, Hollywood left the TinselTown rat race and moved to Summit County.

He joined up with the fellas at 545 Productions, and decided to join Max and Benji in a podcast adventure, all over a breakfast of Denver omlettes and shame.

When not recording podcasts or crying, Hollywood is the Lead Animator and a voice actor for 545’s animated series, DEFENDERS OF QWO.